It’s Monday. I’m going home at 6pm and a middle aged man and a teenage boy are the only people left on the bus with me. I consider the fact that because the driver is also a man I am the only person left on the bus with the correct genetic makeup for boobs. I’m automatically scared, scared because of my own anatomy. I wonder how old I was when I realized that my own body was going to be the cause of the constant anxiety and fear I feel in situations like this. I get off at the last stop and the older man smiles at me while following me up the street. His smile drips, drips, drips and my heart is pounding, pounding, pounding. He turns off down another road, but I run the rest of the way home.
Not all men.
I’m at home on a Tuesday, beginning to plan the travels I want to go on next year. I dream of wandering the streets and meeting strangers. I just can’t wait to escape the city I’ve lived in for 17 long years. But… my mum is hesitant. She’s forever worried about the danger that being a young girl traveling alone can bring. I’ll be alone and she’s scared. Surely I’m invincible. I feel invincible. But I know, I know this danger is real and I can’t help but think to myself, if I feel unsafe in my own city, how am i going to feel in a strange place with strange men who don’t speak the same language as me? If I was my brother planning this, I would probably just be wondering if European girls are going to be hot.
Not all men.
Wednesday is a beautiful sunny day but I’ve always been told that I don’t have a “nice enough body” to wear a bikini on the beach. Ever since I was 6 years old I’ve thought that having tummy fat was ugly. That skin that doesn’t have a perfectly golden glow is undesirable. I amble to a clear patch of sand in my one piece and I can feel pairs of eyes latching onto me. Hairy men in speedos who I don’t look twice at eat into my body with their stares. I’m a piece of meat. I am a piece of meat? I am here for their amusement. Please don’t let me be eaten alive.
Not all men.
Thursday night two friends and I are walking to our god damn school dance when we hear “Jesus look at you! You sluts heading to a pole?” These words snarl out of the mouth of a respectably dressed man and we stop in horror. Shivers roll up my back in fear. It’s dark. We are alone. What. Do. We. Do??? One of us pulls the finger back. I can never be sure how quickly a sexist man can get angry so we walk quickly away. We’re angry, so so angry. But also so… deflated. I wonder if we deserve this shame.
Not all men.
Sitting on the internet, Friday night and scrolling down my Facebook newsfeed:
“Haha, good job at the game today bro. You RAPED them!”
“Damn with tits like that, you’re asking for it :P”
Another sexist comment…
Another sexist comment…
Another sexist comment…
I’m shrinking and shrinking and shrinking and I want to CRY because these boys don’t realize how small they make me feel with just pressing a few keys. I see these boys on the streets, I talk to these boys, I laugh with these boys. Dear GOD, dear GOD i hope these boys don’t think actions speak louder than words…
Not all men.
Three rules that have been drilled into me since I was young run through my mind at 1.30am on a Satur… Sunday Morning:
-Don’t ever talk to strange men
-Don’t ever be alone at night in a strange place
-Don’t ever get into a car with a stranger
I break all 3 of these laws as I pull open the taxi door. Making light conversation with the driver, he doesn’t see my sweaty hand clutching the small pocket knife I keep hidden on me at all times. He doesn’t even realize the fear I feel at his mere presence. He cannot comprehend it, he never will. How easy would this 15 minute car ride be if I was born a boy?
Not all men.
It comes to Sunday, another snoozy, sleepy, Sunday and someone has the AUDACITY to tell me not all men are rapists. I say nothing.
I’m a 17 year old girl.
When I am walking alone and it’s dark, it’s all men.
When I am in a car with a man I don’t know well, it’s all men.
When men drunkenly leer at me on the streets, it’s all men.
When a boy won’t leave me alone at a party, it’s all men.
Not all men are rapists. But for a young girl like me? Every one of them has the potential to be.
a piece i wrote for an english assignment about my personal experiences with rape culture, in particular with the saying “not all men” which i know has been makin a lot of controversy on the internet recently! idk just wanted to share (via trueho)
You’re right, not all men do this. Most are nice guys who know how to treat a lady. Lots of girls just seem to be surrounded by assholes but your experiences won’t deter me from having a good time in the company of the opposite sex, since I’m just lucky I suppose.
When you do the math it just doesn’t add up. A movie costs about $13.75. Plus parking and snacks. On average, I’m spending about $25 every time I go see a movie. I usually see a movie at least 4 times a month. That’s $100 a month. Multiply that by 12 months and I’m spending $1200 a year on movies alone. That’s rent money.
I’m wasting rent money on these films that purposefully exclude me. Why would I do that? That’s completely insane.
If I took that $1200 every year and put it in my savings account I could invest in my own original content. I wish I’d thought of doing this years ago. I’d probably be directing a feature film by now. But as they say, there’s no time like the present.
Then don’t go to the fucking movies. No one is forcing you to. Who goes to the movies four times a month? How much money do you have that you think spending it on a film that could be bought or rented a few months later is no big thing?
Here’s a thought: Get your butt on IMDB.com and search for some movies that don’t “exclude you”. Make it a mission to watch all the Nollywood films you can (that’s Nigerian Hollywood, just so you know, Africa’s movie-making mogul like India’s Bollywood).
Got the honkies playing Black people, got the Black people playing the servants and assassins.
Egyptians weren’t black…they had golden, reddish skin. Well, they referred to themselves as either dark or lighter than their neighbors. Where in the world have you seen Egyptian murals that depict the people as black? And I assume by black you mean very dark skin.
This is the most ridiculous thing I’ve come across in a long time.
I understand the daily hardships that so many people have in a world ruled by white males.
I understand that sometimes this can make it feel as if all white males are the enemy (especially for those who fight for equality).
But posts like this need to stop.
You are not advancing anybodies rights.
You are not promoting anybody’s equality.
This is not activism.
This is hate-mongering.
Thanks for the contribution :)
I’ve lost track, am I even allowed an opinion these days? Whatever. How about this radical idea: Let’s treat each other equally, and then we’ll all be equal? All this mindless mud-slinging achieves nothing and only serves to demonstrate how true objectives of those involved (notably NOT equality).
You guys are good at this! :)
This isn’t okay and you need to fuckin stop.
This is so beautiful it brings a tear to my eye.
Passive-Aggressiveness level: Meme-making Tumblrite
Tell me again how you’re being oppressed again, since you obviously have lots of time making fun of people over the Internet like a child.
I went to the mall, and a little girl called me a terrorist.
My name is Ela. I am seventeen years old. I am not Muslim, but my friend told me about her friend being discriminated against for wearing a hijab. So I decided to see the discrimination firsthand to get a better understanding of what Muslim women go through.
My friend and I pinned scarves around our heads, and then we went to the mall. Normally, vendors try to get us to buy things and ask us to sample a snack. Clerks usually ask us if we need help, tell us about sales, and smile at us. Not today. People, including vendors, clerks, and other shoppers, wouldn’t look at us. They didn’t talk to us. They acted like we didn’t exist. They didn’t want to be caught staring at us, so they didn’t look at all.
And then, in one store, a girl (who looked about four years old) asked her mom if my friend and I were terrorists. She wasn’t trying to be mean or anything. I don’t even think she could have grasped the idea of prejudice. However, her mother’s response is one I can never forgive or forget. The mother hushed her child, glared at me, and then took her daughter by the hand and led her out of the store.
All that because I put a scarf on my head. Just like that, a mother taught her little girl that being Muslim was evil. It didn’t matter that I was a nice person. All that mattered was that I looked different. That little girl may grow up and teach her children the same thing.
This experiment gave me a huge wakeup call. It lasted for only a few hours, so I can’t even begin to imagine how much prejudice Muslim girls go through every day. It reminded me of something that many people know but rarely remember: the women in hijabs are people, just like all those women out there who aren’t Muslim.
People of Tumblr, please help me spread this message. Treat Muslims, Jews, Christians, Buddhists, Hindus, Pagans, Taoists, etc., exactly the way you want to be treated, regardless of what they’re wearing or not wearing, no exceptions. Reblog this. Tell your friends. I don’t know that the world will ever totally wipe out prejudice, but we can try, one blog at a time.
coming up next on white people solve racism
muslim women dont need your white saviour attitude, you might now finally realise what it’s like to be excluded from society because of a piece of garment but you’re never going to experience it in the way we do.
she literally worded this so well and so honestly and tried so hard not to be rude, she just tried to understand what you go through. she’s not trying to be a saviour, she’s trying to raise awareness. she never said she’d solve anything or experience it like you do. stop doing exactly what other people do to you and shut down someones ideas just because of their color or religion or anything. this is a valid and completely pure hearted thing.
It’s funny how people act like white people are the biggest douchebags, and then act like total asshats themselves, huh?
She did this to get a GLIMPSE into the shit Muslim women are put through. She never claimed total understanding; in fact she said that she “can’t even begin to imagine how much prejudice Muslim girls go through every day.” She ADMITTED that she doesn’t know everything these women go through, and yet she’s STILL attacked? I cannot fathom why it’s deemed “okay” to be prejudiced against white people, even when we try to understand what it is people of other ethnicities/skin tones/nationalities/religions/etc go through. If you want, we can stop trying to understand and let everyone wallow in their self-pity.
Welcome to tumblr
Fuck empathy and understanding, am I right? Just continue to act like your pain is unlike anyone else’s pain ever, in the history of the world, univserse, galaxy. Uh-uh my feelings cannot be replicated except within one group.
Fun Historical Fact: There used to be more gay and lesbian content in early silent films until religious groups protested resulting in “decency standards.”
THE WAY THE ONE GIRL LOOKS DOWN ALL SHY AND THE OTHER CUPS HER FACE SO SWEETLY TO COMFORT HER- AHHHH
THIS IS MY FAVORITE GIF OF ALL TIME. I ALWAYS GET HAPPY WHEN I SEE IT ON MY DASH GAAAAH.
Fun Historical Fact: This is a scene from the movie, Orphans of the Storm. A movie about two sisters who are not romantically involved and are instead caught up in the turmoil of the French Revolution, separated, and eventually reunited.
Get your facts straight. Do you honestly think the 20’s would have been accepting of the gay community? Oh yeah, women can’t vote, work or think for themselves, and people of color are lower than dirt. But lesbians? Yeah, okay we’re cool with that.
Fuck off. Stop spreading misinformation.
I never asked, I just got up and said “I’m going to the bathroom”. Fuck asking, you want me to piss myself?
we’re all getting arrested for this
I have to believe the President would die laughing at these.